Eternally Yours
by mystixnight
Summary: Terru's story, from the beginning to end. Ever wondered why she's so messed up? Sure you want to know? (If you do end up reading it, reviews would be appreciated)
1. Prologue: Diviena

Disclaimer: Eyries are copyright to Neopets.com. Most characters are the brainchild or myself, Mystixnight, but some are used with permission from the creator. Terru in particular is my own. Please don't claim her as yours, or use her without my permission.  
  
A/N: Bwehehehe! Ski, guess what I did? Just for you I uploaded the Terru story thing onto fanfiction.net. Don't you feel loved? I'm going to try and continue it. It'll be long, I warn you now. VERY long. How could it not be when she's lived for so long? So basically, unless you have a lot of time on your hands or like reading particularly lengthy writing things, just read the parts that interest you. The chapter names will give a semi- explanation of what's going on so you can pick from them easily. Anywho, WARNING: this story is rated R for a reason. It's going to contain a fair bit of violence and so on. If you don't like violence, or think it's inappropriate, please just save both of us the trouble and don't read this story. If you'd like to read on anyway, go ahead. Just don't say I didn't give you fair warning.  
  
* * *  
  
Eternally Yours  
  
Mystixnight  
  
Prologue: Diviena  
  
Diviena shifted her weight awkwardly, trying hard not to smother the little cubs that slept at her side. A soft smile, her gaze a caress upon their minute frames, curved her beak. She could have been beautiful... Hauntingly so.... But not any more. Her pallet, made for love, life and laughter. For songs sung under the light of the moon in a field, fragrant with the blooms of flowers. For the gentle care of her little ones... Her face was no more than that of a tired eyrie. The weight of the world seeming to weigh down upon her shoulders, causing them to hunch in a pathetic manner. Her eyes, once so bright as a child, and then misted with love and tenderness or he who she thought was her calling in life, were dull, sunken into her skull. Ah... How she longed for the days gone past. The days when she wasn't so frozen, when it didn't revolt her when Viel touched her shoulder or tried to speak with her. It wasn't so bad now... He had almost given up. Just a little longer and he'd get the picture...  
  
A soft smirk lit her features; her eyes going vacant for a moment as she thought of a life without him, her talons digging gently into the foliage littered terra. Her mind clued in suddenly to exactly what thoughts had been seeping into her mind and she had to swallow down a sob. "NO!" she wanted to scream, but her three cubs were nestled at her side and in the darkness and quietness of the night her scream would awaken all and everything. She couldn't do that. If something was in the mood for a meal... The cubs wouldn't last long with only her, shaking and sobbing silently as she tried to get over herself. Ah, god, what had she been thinking? Viel had been so good to her. So kind and gentle, so patient, so quiet, when she had shuddered at his touch in recent times. So quick to give in to her suggestions, to offer a kind word and a shoulder for her to lay her head on when the tears that never seemed to have reason swelled within her. But again, what was she thinking? Viel? Had she ever really loved him? Such a coward, so indifferent, so fragile seeming! Why couldn't he just take hold sometimes? Snap at her, shout at her, beat her or abuse her? Anything to justify this hatred, this annoyance, this fear she felt within her... Why did he have to be so perfect? If only he was cruel or careless, at least then she would have an excuse to leave him. But she couldn't... How could she? Considering how good he had been to her?  
  
She buried her face in her paws, her body shaking with her silent grief. A never-ending sorrow that she couldn't explain... That she couldn't understand. Ethea stirred from her slumber, her face, so innocent and peaceful in her sleep, creased in worry for her mother. "Mamma?" she minute figure, so small... So tiny, even considering her young age. "Mamma, what's the matter...? Why are you crying again?" Diviena couldn't help laughing through her tears at her littlest. She was always so somber, so serious. "Nothing, my dear, my baby... Go back to sleep darling." Genuine tenderness for this petite little creature was etched in Diviena's soul. The other cubs, curled against her, their warmth helping to relieve the chill that she couldn't rid herself of, were nothing to her. An annoyance. It pained her so badly. What a horrible mother she is. To hate so deeply two of her very own, of her own blood and body, and yet whenever she looked at him all she saw was her future... Trapped! Suffocating! Dying in this world! She was to live the rest of her life with Viel. She would raise his children. She would pretend to love him. She would try, honestly try, as she did every waking moment of the day to love him as fully, as tenderly as he loved her... But she couldn't. And here were her children, her very own cubs, as repellent to her as he was; though for all the world they were as gentle and tender and sweet as he was... But then again... Maybe that was what she hated...  
  
Ah, but it didn't matter. She had Ethea, and that was all she needed for now. Little Ethea, so troubled in her own way, understanding all and everything without being told. Such a comfort in her own touchy and aggravated little way. In a way she was like herself... So uncomfortable. So sure and absolute in the fact that she hated where she was, but wanted so much to love it.  
  
With a gentle nudge Diviena placed Ethea back in the nook 'twixt her head and her paws. "Sleep now, Ethea... You're father will be home soon..." Her voice broke, faltering over the words, but she smiled complacently for the sake of the child, and Ethea seemed contented by that, though her own minute beak curled upwards in a sort of infantile grimace. "Oi... Alright mamma" Ethea curled herself into the little niche and Diviena watched as slowly her breathing steadied out, rhythmic now. It was soothing to watch the bantam figure sleep.  
  
* * *  
  
Diviena hadn't been aware she had fallen asleep herself, but she found herself jolting a the soft sound of paw steps crackling the undergrowth, as obvious as it was that this creature was trying to silence them. Ethea twitched in her sleep and Diviena rose slowly, shushing the half-asleep murmurs of the little cub. The others didn't move, a soft snore emanating from the eldest. Her eyes rose slowly to meet Viel's gaze. Held gently between his beak was a small carcass of a kacheek. Diviena couldn't help but notice the care with which the kill had been made. The face of the prey was still calm. It had never known what had hit it. There was blood on neither the kacheek nor Viel. He had snapped the neck with careful efficiency, so swift it had caused no pain. She ruffled her feathers slightly in aggravation; unsure why the fact that he was so kind to his prey bothered her so much. Even when she herself was usually one to put her meals out of their misery as quickly as possibly. But for Viel to do it... What did he care! Did he care more for this runt of a thing that was to just end up in his stomach more than he cared for her?! No. No, That was unfair of her. He did love her. She knew it. He tried so hard... Why couldn't she...  
  
Viel spoke gently, his gaze lovingly passing over his cubs, sleeping so angelically. Diviena narrowed her pupils, but otherwise kept up a friendly appearance, stepping between them and her mate. He didn't have the right to look on them... They were HERS not his... They were all she had. Viel nuzzled her gently, unaware of her going rigid at his touch, or if he did notice it, he ignored. Or maybe he did know... He just wished so hard, hoped so much, so unbearably much, that it wasn't true, he would pretend he had imagined it....  
  
"I brought you something to eat, darling... You must be starved. Here, let's move away from the little ones, a ways... I'd hate to wake them when they sleep so well. Ethea has just started sleeping through the night hasn't she...?" He tilted his head to the side, but received no answer, and seemed to take it as agreement, leading her forwards a ways, before setting the dead creature down before her.  
  
She ate sedately for a while, finishing when she felt full. As she did she noticed Viel becoming a bit awkward and raised her head warily. He spoke carefully... Haltingly, as if unsure... "Diviena, my love... Do you ever think that..? Well. Ethea is basically weaned off of milk now... She wouldn't be bothered if..." he trailed off, eyes moving bashfully to the ground. Diviena couldn't help the coldness in her heart from reaching her vocals as she replied. "If what..."  
  
Viel looked up hopefully, his gaze holding tenderness... An innocence that only made her want to scream with the pain, the hatred it brought up that she didn't want. "If you were to become with cub again... I mean... Four cubs isn't a large litter... And Zecheriah is almost old enough to start hunting with me... We would have more than enough food for another mouth, m'dear..."  
  
Diviena blinked at the name... Oh, yes... He was the one that snored... She forgot about he and the other female at times. They just... They just didn't matter sometimes. Comprehension dawned slowly as he reached out a wing to wrap around her side, almost shyly. With a snarl she felt herself twist from beneath, her talons slashing savagely across his face. "I WILL BEAR NO MORE OF YOUR CHILDREN!"  
  
Viel stumbled back, a shout of pain and surprise mingling with a gasp of sadness... A sorrow. Unable to understand why the one he loved more than life itself could do this to him. Diviena fell backwards as he left her side, as if it was she who had been struck. Her beak went agape; her eyes flickering over his face, on side gashed horribly, one eye closed to protect itself from the blood that poured freely down his pallet. But the other eye... It was what shocked her most. So filled with a horror, a longing that she could relate to, however differently. And she knew. Ah, she knew. Just as she longed to love him, he longed even more to feel that she did. To know that the undying devotion, the boundless love and care were returned even a little.  
  
She could feel the tears coursing freely down her face. Feel herself racking with the sobs. "I'm sorry... I'm sorry... I have to do this... I have to... I get it now, Viel. Ah... Tell me... Tell me you understand too... Viel?" She stood up slowly, comprehension dawning with a spark upon her mind, her eyes lighting up. Viel shook his head, squinting through the blood at his beloved. "No... Diviena... You need to calm down. I'll... I'll leave if that's what you want just... just back up, Diviena. M'love...?"  
  
If she heard she paid no heed, walking forward with a slow, ritualistic pace, toward her mate, who returned her unblinking gaze. Terrified... "No, Viel... This is the way it has to be. You know how much I hate this, right? In heaven there is no hate.... Only love! Only love! I can love you, Viel! I can love you, I promise!"  
  
Viel shook his head, gesturing with both forepaws for her to stop, his tongue stuck in his beak, unable to voice his protests, panic taking over. He scrambled back from this crazed eyrie that he had once loved, in his haste falling back over the carcass of the last meal he had given her. Hitting the ground with a thud, he let out a panicked slew of sounds, half shouts of misunderstanding and commands to stop, partly words of soothing to calm Diviena, and even yet mingled with screams of pure panic and horror.  
  
Diviena stepped calmly over the dead beast, standing over Viel, who lay writhing and shrieking on the ground, eyes impossibly wide with the terror, his limbs flailing in an effort to stand and run but his mind not replying to his commands. Diviena shook her head, wrapping wings and paws 'round him in a motherly fashion, holding his head to her chest. "Viel....? Viel, darling... Don't worry... This is the way it has to be. It HAS to be"  
  
And one paw lowered to his, neck, pressing against it as it rose and fell with his harsh, ragged breathing. As she made shushing sounds, Viel rose above the panic for a moment, surging forward towards Diviena, bowling her over backwards. Her shriek resounded with both surprise and rage. "VIEL! GET BACK HERE! WE'RE NOT DONE YET! IT'S THE ONLY WAY!" But he wasn't listening, he was hurtling off into the undergrowth, stumbling and tripping in his mad desire to flee.  
  
Diviena took off after him, hurtling through the shrubs and bushes; eyes riveted on his fleeing frame. With a leap she knocked him down, paws raking down on his form beneath her countless times, the blood flying in all direction's, unaware it was her blood too as he slashed at her in retaliation. One of his blows caught her chin, knocking her back. In an effort to steady herself she grabbed out, locking her paw round his throat. His back paws gave a savage shove, bowling her over backwards.  
  
* * *  
  
The leaves 'above her head were moving... Spinning... Shrinking and growing. Diviena snarled, rising to her haunches, her head aching at simply her thoughts. She glanced round through blurred vision, blinking back the darkness. There behind her was a wooden stump. Indented very visibly. And stained with a little blood as well. A single paw reached up to the back of her head, to feel blood still flowing freely. "The bastard! He knocked me out! Now we'll never ever... never be together! GOD DAMN YOU, VIEL!" Her shriek as sent to nothing but the undergrowth around her though. She raised her other forepaw to steady herself and found that she was clutching something in her paw... Feathers... Feathers and flesh.  
  
Memories came back to her. Yes, she'd been holding his throat when she went back. She cackled with satisfaction. He was probably dead, anyway. He'd just crawled off to do so in private. She refused to believe in her madness that he could have survived. As far as she knew or cared, He was dead...  
  
With stumbling, shaking steps due to her lack of balance from the hefty blow to the head she made her way slowly back to the clearing, stopping to collapse from fatigue 'aside the kacheek carcass and eat heartily to regain her strength. She sun was rising 'fore she made her way back to the cubs, finding them whimpering and scared, huddled in a group.  
  
"Mother...? Mother why are you all... All bloody? Where's Father?" The eldest daughter, her pelt purest violet, her optics a creamy colouration, beautiful, looked up at her mother with bewilderment, bordering on fear at the sight of the shining in Diviena's occuli.  
  
"Don't you worry 'bout a thing my dear... You're father is waiting for us somewhere special. Very special indeed and we have to go meet him. So be brave because it's a bit of a scary trip... Are you strong enough to come my daughter? Do you love your family enough?"  
  
The little cub, unaware of what she got herself into nodded vigorously, wrapping both paws round her mother in emphasis. "I love you enough Mother! I do! You know that! Don't leave me behind!"  
  
Zecheriah, the eldest nodded in agreement, joining his sibling in wrapping his paws round his mother. Diviena smiled in pleasure. Yes, even these cubs she had despised in life she could love in death. And they would love her! And they would all be a family. Somewhere in the back of her mind, sanity must still have been intact, screaming that a child was missing from this equation. But Diviena paid no heed to sanity anymore. She was too far into the madness.  
  
"My little ones, buck up your chins and close your eyes! Be still now, this will hurt a little but it needs to be done to go and find your father..." Both fledglings, too young and naive to know better did as they were told. They were still smiling as their lived ended... By their mother's own talons they fell into a never-ending sleep. Heaven's gates were open to them, so young and innocent. They would never know pain again...  
  
Diviena smiled in satisfaction at the two minute forms, still and unmoving before her. Now she could join them and they would love! With slow, set determination Diviena slid her talon across her throat, choking and gasping as it took it's toll. She fell to the ground with a thud, confused as to why it was taking so long... Her gaze, fading into blackness came to Ethea, standing confused and unsure before her, disbelief written plainly on her features.  
  
"Mamma! Mamma, what did you do? You killed them! You killed everyone... Mamma, you killed yourself! I don't... I don't understand, Mamma!" The little creature shook with tears, she couldn't shed and a fear... The first fear she had ever known as her mother stretched out a shaking talon towards her.  
  
"Ethea! Ethea, you have to... have to come too... Come here... Come HERE! ETHEA! ETHEA!" But her words were lost on the cub, which had looked upon the outstretched paw with a final understanding and a loathing. The last things Diviena ever saw before the fires of hell took her was the cold, accusing gaze of her youngest, most beloved in all the world, the hatred in that sight shocking her even in her state of weakness... And then nothing... Nothing but the retreating back of little eyrie as it fled... The blackness took over then...  
  
And that was the end of Diviena's story...  
  
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A/N: I told you it was gruesome. This is probably the most disturbing of all the chapters actually. It's the base of all the reasons Terru is as messed up as she is. And yes, in case you were wondering why Diviena went nutters, she was insane. She wasn't always; it was something that built gradually. And Viel set it off. And you can probably guess who Ethea is, already. Or can you? Heh, nevermind me. It's 12:53 and I still haven't eaten breakfast. I'll go get a bite after I upload this and maybe I'll regain partial grasp on my sanity. 


	2. Childhood

A/N: Second chapter! Or, actually, first, but the prologue counts as a chapter I guess. I've been writing this for quite awhile but forgot about it and stopped for a loooong time. So here's the continuation of Ethea's story, for your reading pleasure.  
  
Part 1: Early Childhood  
  
The world is neither a kind nor welcoming place to a cub such as Ethea. She was lost. She was tired. She was hungry. And more than that she was scared. Her mind, churning with a sense of betrayal and hatred and at the same time love, wracked her soul to the point that she felt physically ill and had to cease her stumbling every so often to wretch.  
  
The tears that had evaded her where coming now, blinding her. All she could see was a haze of bright hues and sunlight as a new day began, breaking and merging in a flash of colours as her tears distorted all and everything in sight. The little creature snagged a paw on a gnarling tree root, skidding pallet first into the ground, a squeal of pain and surprise breaking the gentle chorus of the morning. Ethea pulled herself to her haunches, sobbing openly, loudly. Her face was scraped down the cheek from her fall, the dirt streaked over it and stinging the wound. Her paws were bruised and bleeding as the tiny creature hadn't had any experience before with long periods of travel. Her stomach fanned out waves of aching hunger, contracting in spasms of retaliation at it's fast.  
  
Ethea curled up into a ball, beneath the leaves of a bush, letting her self- pity wash over her as her shrieking sobs slowly subsided whilst slumber spread it's tendrils over her mind.  
  
* * *  
  
She was cold... So cold... Her face felt numb, but feeling nothing was better than the stinging of before. Violet optics blinked slowly, a bantam paw reaching up to wipe the pine needles from her face where they adhered themselves to the salty tear trails. Ethea yawned; beak stretched open wide as she stood. The cub shook herself like a canine, sending all the debris from her pelt flying in all directions. She blinked, a slow smile creeping over her maw. It was nice... The light filtered through the treetops in a gentle haze, highlighting dust specks that drifted serenely to the earth.  
  
Her beak opened to release an innocent giggle of pleasure, but was interrupted by an abrupt rumble from the stomach, familiar waves of pain spreading over her, a harsh reality check for the little one.  
  
For the first time Ethea had to consider food. True, her mother had been weaning her off of her milk lately, so she could manage solids. But her mother wasn't someone she wanted to think about. The little eyrie let out a squeak of fear and anger as the memories flooded back. So much blood. The smell of it was intoxicating, like a drug, still clogging her nares.  
  
Ethea was surprised to find that it wasn't entirely unpleasant. Her stomach gave another heave, releasing an audible growl of discontent. The bantam cub was forced to start her search. Grass, leaves and even dirt were all given a try in quick succession, each less appetizing than the former. The petite eyrie gave a frustrated yowl. Where exactly did her mother get all that food? Did it fall out of the sky?  
  
She froze as a familiar scent caught her, breathing in great greedy gulps of it. Soft sounds of movement reached her pinnae, sending an unfamiliar surge through every one of her undersized limbs. Saliva built in her beak and she swallowed it quickly, pressing herself to the ground on instinct and crawling beneath a bush to her left.  
  
She had to stifle a silent mew of surprise and hunger at the sight before her. The Kyrii was eating calmly; chattering softly to itself as it grazed. Even though she didn't know it, she was sizing it up. So much meat! It was young... She could sub-consciously tell by the size. Her muscles were tensing unbeknownst to her.  
  
Just at the moment, as she was still watching awestruck with her violet occuls, her stomach gave a loud roar of hunger. The Kyrii gave a shrill squeak and even as it's legs shot out, to send it flying, Ethea found herself hurtling forward from the underbrush, talons unsheathed, a yowl of hunger and frantic disconcertion shaking her.  
  
The Kyrii thrashed from where it struggled beneath her, and then beside her. She was too small! She was too weak! She couldn't hold it. Quaking with confusion and panic she slashed out with a paw, flailing madly in a random guess. Her paw took hold and the next thing she knew the Kyrii lay sprawled on the ground giving low gurgles of distress. A stream of blood was seeping through the paws it had clenched around it's own neck. Ethea was dumbstruck with fear and hunger, rising above the maimed creature. She lifted her tiny paw and...  
  
Froze. Ethea's gaze met that of the creature, panicked and afraid. Its eyes begged her for mercy, its squeals piercing her ears. It was so young... It was so terrified. She couldn't do it... But she had to! Oh, but she had to... She found herself sobbing, torn between what was right and what was necessary. Blinded by her tears for the second time this morning she slashes with a quavering paw and put the creature out of it's misery.  
  
With faltering steps she drew back, leaving a trail of blood in her wake. What had she done...? How could she eat it? Against her better judgement she faced the still animal, her stomach flopping as she did so. She wouldn't!  
  
With set determination she sat herself as far away as she could from the carcass while still being in sight of it, shoulders hunched, refusing to let herself give way. She minutes ticked by into hours... Her stomach was unceasing in it's begging for nourishment and it wasn't long before she was doubled over in pain.  
  
Maybe... Maybe just one bite? It was dead already... It wouldn't hurt... Right?  
  
Hesitantly the petit cub leaned over the kill, cringing as she opened her beak and gently tore a scratch in the Kyrii's hide. Blood seeped slowly from the wound, revolting and alluring at the same time. Choking on bile and a sob, both, Ethea leaned over and took for herself a small mouthful of the meat, swallowing it down whole.  
  
She staggered back, coughing as it went down, but a fire lit behind her optics. Her hunger flared three-fold and with no reluctance this time she dove forward to the carcass, eating ravenously. For in truth she was starving... But the meat was sweet in her mouth and her stomach craved more. Her misgivings were forgotten as she ate her fill and more, 'til she thought she would burst.  
  
A voice in her head squeaked out its indignation and the wrong in this. She'd killed! She'd devoured it! A living creature! Ah, but it was too late, and it had tasted so good... She could overlook it...  
  
With the clumsy steps of a contented toddler, Ethea made her way back a bush, curling up beneath it. Sleep was quick to take hold of her...  
  
* * *  
  
The days passed in similar succession. She killed and ate and slept as she pleased, travelling all the while away from her beginnings. She had gone back, but only once. She'd had a feeble hope that maybe she'd go back and be mistaken. Mamma would be fine and Zecheriah and Dinyra would wake up and laugh and chortle as they used to. And her father would be gone for good. Not hurt, for Ethea didn't hate him as her mother had, just gone. Off to a better life for him.  
  
She didn't dislike her sire, but all she knew was that when he was around Diviena was miserable and quick to anger. She just wanted to be happy... For all of them to be happy... Was that too much to ask? No, no it wasn't.  
  
And so she had made her way to that shrub-enclosed clearing, peering in. It had been dark, the moon a beacon of guidance in the sky, fueling her hope. At first she had been elated. They were there! Mamma and Zecheriah and Dinyra! They were there! Just sleeping! Curled up in a bundle, safe and warm and welcoming. She was home!  
  
She had bounded forward, tripping over herself in her want for the comforts of family, letting out an infantile squeak of joy. Diving forward into their midst where they were resting together, she had burrowed beneath her mother's forepaw, snuggling into the feathers of her mane.  
  
"Mamma!" She had been so full, so relieved, so contented to be there among them that it took a moment for the chill to settle in; for her to realize they were all cold... They were so cold. Ethea pulled back in confusion, looking to Dinyra for reassurance, as the older sibling had always been to quick to give.  
  
"Din? What's wrong with you?" Dinrya had looked down on her, her beak open as though to speak. But the gaze was glassy, the pupils unfocused. Dead and lifeless... In the ethereal glow of moonlight it was like a horror story unfolding. The lines across their throats, the blood matted and stained into their plumage, the unseeing eyes and gaping maws.  
  
Ethea froze, and to her it almost seemed as if their still paws groped for her, trying to pull her into the afterlife along with them. And her mother's, oh her mother's, the talons were extended, clawing for her neck. She wanted Ethea to come... She wanted her to!  
  
Ethea squealed in terror, scrabbling back from the pile of bodies on the ground. She didn't want to die, she'd didn't want to end up like them. Always watching without being able to see...  
  
She'd never gone back, needless to say... In fact she'd spent the greater part of her childhood wandering away. She never grew in size as most would, and would later accredit it to the shock and malnutrition of her early years. She just sort of reached her full height as a cub. That didn't mean she stopped growing fully. She lengthened, becoming sinuous and lithe, elegant, even. Beautiful to a point, if one could see past the troubled mentality.  
  
The rest of her childhood was a slow, repetitive drawl. She had forgotten nothing of it, all the same. Every moment was forever burned onto the back of her eyelids, called up when she most wanted to forget them. It was... a dark period in her life, to say the least. Not that much of it was been light.  
  
* * *  
  
It was when she was in early adolescence that the met him... Again.  
  
The kacheek was meaty, stocking up on food before winter and all the more tasty for it. Ethea smacked her beak, pleased with the kill. The blood was warm and the body would last her for a long while yet. She had no need of moving for now. She'd relax whilst she could.  
  
It wasn't long before she heard a gentle sound. Like a tail swishing over her head. She opened her eyes, blearily, searching for the extremity in question only to see nothing. Dismissing it she closed her eyes again only to hear the same audible.  
  
With a small sound of disconcertion she pushed herself up onto her haunches, stopping dead, just as he did across from her. He stood stock still, her former meal clenched gently in his jaws, a trail of smeared blood divulging the details of his plan. To drag away her hard earned food and take it for his own.  
  
They scrutinized each other carefully, the strange eyrie releasing the kacheek and taking a careful step forward. Ethea took this as a challenge.  
  
"Who do you think you are?" She snapped, pleased with how firm her voice was, if still youthful.  
  
The other eyrie gazed at her further, and she felt her nape prickle at the careful gaze.  
  
"Well?" She muttered after a time, the silence settling over her and making her feel edgy.  
  
"I might ask you the same," the other eyrie replied. Ethea froze, suddenly unsure. It sounded different, and yet familiar. Like déja vu, but not.  
  
"That's mine," she gestured with an unsheathed paw to the carcass, her voice sounding less calm to her own ears.  
  
"I shall eat my fill and leave you with the rest. There is more than enough... It's reasonable, yes?"  
  
Ethea nodded, grudgingly, easily persuaded in her youth. "Only if you tell me who you are..."  
  
The eyrie lowered his head slowly, deliberating. "Very well... I am dead. I live and I breath, but my heart is not my own anymore. Satisfied?"  
  
Ethea shook her head, not even noticing the sarcasm in his tone in her young, naïve state. "No... Are you really dead? Like... a ghost?"  
  
The older eyrie gave a low chuckle, straightening up and sizing her over again. "No. I am alive, but what's dead is my emotions..."  
  
Ethea scowled. "Will my emotions die?"  
  
The elder took a breath. "Let's hope not..." He said no more, settling down to eat. Ethea sat where she was, watching him closely. He was old, she decided. Not really old, but he was at least a generation older than she was. And he was a bit... Tufty. In places his fur bunched out in tufts, leaving bare patches behind.  
  
The old male looked up upon feeling her gaze upon him, tracing it to the 'tufts'. "Scars, youngling... I dare say you'll have your own crop by the time you're my age."  
  
She nodded, accepting it as truth. Settling to the ground, little tail weaving back and fourth nervously she watched him eat. And he sure could eat! She felt her plumage bristle. "I need to eat too, you know!" She squeaked out, trying to look formidable, but failing horribly.  
  
The old male gave another laugh, nodding to humour the child. "True enough, it was good of you to share."  
  
Ethea seemed pleased by this, puffing out her chest feathers. "S'okay." She looked up to very immodestly elaborate on her modesty. The look in his eyes stopped her and she balked a little, skittering back a few paces. The other eyrie stood to his paws, stalking forward a step. His optics shone with an emotion she couldn't place. Not hunger, not curiousity... What was it?  
  
He stretched out a paw to her, and she gave a shrill cry as his digits closed around the scruff of her neck. Spitting and clawing wildly at air, she struggled as he lifted her to his eye level, tipping her head back. "It can't be..."  
  
* * *  
  
A/N: Well, well, well... What can't be? You'll see! Actually, seeing as how my writing skills aren't exactly excellent, you probably already know exactly what's coming. But, meh, please keep reading anyway! Humour me, I'm a good little Mystix, I promise! Reviews are once again highly appreciated. 


	3. Family

A/N: Skidaddle's probably got an urge to kick y lazy arse for taking to incredibly long to get this one up. Don't kill me! It's up! In my last author's note I put 'you probably already know exactly what's coming'... My question: was I 'hopped up on the goofballs' or something? This isn't easily guessable in any way, shape or form, I'm afraid. Unless you're trapped in my head like the other three. I mean... Um... Yes, moving onto the story!  
  
Part 2: Family/When the End Started  
  
The elder eyrie dropped Ethea like she was a burning brand and not a cub of flesh and blood. He shuffled back a step, eyes darting back and forth into the underbrush. Ethea took this as a chance to scramble back a ways, far enough that she could run if she had to. She was too curious to leave completely, though, as he started muttering to himself.  
  
"You can stop now! I know she's not real, just like the rest of them..." Ethea followed his gaze into the foliage but turned back, perplexed, as nothing presented itself. The male seemed to notice this too because he let out a shriek as proceeded to stomp and trash about in what could only be described as a temper tantrum. "STOP! STOPSTOPSTOP!"  
  
"Who are you talking to?" Ethea clamped her beak shut tightly, having forgotten her wariness for a brief moment. The other eyrie stopped dead and looked at her again in that same manner she couldn't recognize.  
  
"Is she real?" he murmured to himself, slinking forward slowly. "Of course I'm real," Ethea snorted indignantly, only remembering to skitter back again just before he came too close. "They keep sending me fake ones," he told her as if he was discussing the weather, switching moods quickly. "I tell them not to, and that I just want the real one, but they think that they can trick me into wanting someone else." He gave a low grunt of a chuckle as if in scorn.  
  
Ethea couldn't help it. She was interested. "Who do you want?" She craned her neck back to look up at him, her tail swaying from side to side. The male blinked, looking as confused as she'd felt. "Why you, darling? Don't you recognize me?" Ethea balked, taking a closer look at him. Dark gray plumage, scruffy looking, and the sort of wild eyes... She took it all in, but no recognition sparked. He shook his head quickly, hurriedly drawing closer, too fast for her to scurry back and placing a paw on the back of her shoulders. "I didn't know it was you at first either, love, it's all right. Look again! Look again, and you'll see it's me... It's your daddy, Diviena..."  
  
Ethea didn't understand, though she cowered at the mention of the name. "I'm no-", she started quickly, but the male started again, drowning her out. "I was getting worried about you! Your mother was too. She just caught a nice uni for the both of us and she's been waiting. Have you been off with that Viel again? That cub has a bad influence on you... Your mother and I think it would be best if you two left each other alone for the next while."  
  
"But I'm not-" Ethea protested loudly, but once again the male silence spoke over her. "Of course you're not hungry, you just ate a kacheek! But we can't keep your mother waiting. No, no, no... Let's not keep her waiting."  
  
Ethea had absolutely no idea what was going on, but she found herself being steered into the underbrush by the gray male, unable to squirm away from his firm grasp as he chattered away, mostly to himself. "You're looking thinner, has your mother noticed? I'll have to tell her. She'll be glad to have you back, we're been looking all day. You and Viel wandered far for such little ones, didn't you? Did he leave you out here? I'll be having a word with his sire, I can tell you that."  
  
Eventually she gave up struggling watching him bemusedly as he kept up the relentless banter. It wasn't hard to tell that he was completely off his rocker after the first ten minutes. Occasionally he'd look to the sides at random trees and smile and nod, or chuckle as if someone had said something amusing. He'd reply with "Yes, she is getting big, isn't she," or maybe "Well, she is a growing cub. They all like to explore at this age."  
  
She soon just let his voice fade into the background, troubling over the subject of what he'd been saying earlier. Diviena? Why in the hell would he think she was Diviena? Granted, she had her mother's pelt, but her mother had been, well, a mother! An adult. Full-grown. Ethea was still an adolescent, and undersized to boot. And her mother had had golden optics, Ethea had gotten her father's violet ones. What exactly was this eyrie thinking?  
  
A glance upward to the still muttering creature assured her 'not much'. Not much that was sane, anyway... But, on the other hand, he was being pleasant; he was holding her gently... She couldn't see a reason to be afraid. She could wait until whenever they stopped walking to leave. She didn't think he'd be able to track her very well, if his state of mind was any indication.  
  
* * *  
  
All right, so maybe she'd been wrong... It had been a good few hours of walking, until she'd mumbled something about her paws being sore and he'd hurriedly brought them to a stop, making a great deal of inspecting her over for any signs of fatigue. She's assured him she was fine, but on an after though mentioned she might be hungry. It didn't take more than that for him to insist that she wait were they'd stopped as he collected some food.  
  
She'd waited until she was sure he had wandered far enough away and then set off on her own in the opposite direction.  
  
'The conversation had been nice,' she admitted to herself, if one-sided. And she wondered for a moment if her own father would have been that devoted to her if they'd stayed together as she'd grown older. From what she'd pieced together in the old eyrie's ramblings he hadn't thought much of Viel. But in what she could remember, he'd never been cruel to her... 'Is he really my grandfather?' she mused. She didn't know how she felt about that, if it was true. She missed her family, which was a fact. Save for her mother, whom she hoped was burning in hell for what she'd done. That was another point; this was her mother's father. And she'd gotten used to being on her own. And let's not forget that he's crazy beyond belief... That's not exactly the family she'd had in mind. And she'd never met him, so who said he was telling the truth? But who would know her mother from around here?  
  
All right, so he had to be telling the truth. The fact still remained that she didn't know him, despite how well he thought he knew her (though he thought she was her mother from the sounds of things). She was still greatly confused, and maybe even reconsidering leaving without a word to him (he did seem nice... Deluded but nice). She wasn't given much of a choice, though, as a weight pressed down on her from above, forcing her knees to buckle so she lay sprawled flat on the ground.  
  
"Again! He's here isn't he? That damn, Viel!" Ethea groaned at the familiar voice, but not at hearing it as she would have thought, but at him bringing up Viel again. "It's not Viel, I swear. He's not here," she said, feeling the need to defend him for some reason as she shrugged her way out from under his wing. "Oh, yes he is... VIEL GET OUT HERE! GET OUT!" Fearing that the eyrie might start throwing another of his temper tantrums Ethea rushed forward quickly. "I said he's not here! It's just me. Just me."  
  
It took another moment, but he finally calmed down, even if he was still sending a few suspicious glances out into the trees. "You weren't leaving again, were you darling?" He rounded his gaze on her, and Ethea squirmed under the hurt in his eyes. 'Yes, I was. I was leaving, because I don't know you, you're not my father, Diviena is a sickening creature and she's DEAD, so leave me alone!' She would have liked to say it, dearly loved to just spit it out and run off right then. But she couldn't... "No... I was just looking for you... I'm not hungry anymore," she hesitated, wincing, "Father."  
  
Ethea was torn. Had she done the right thing? She couldn't toy with him, but he was so sure... He wanted so much to believe she was his daughter. And, she wanted family, didn't she? Well, here was her chance! He was family. But was it worth getting tied down, when she'd spent so long trying to get rid of everything? Did she honestly think this was best?  
  
Her doubts were numbed for a moment in the expression on the old eyrie's guise as she addressed him as a father figure. His beak spread wide, his head held a touch higher, back straightening, wings lifting up off his back ever so slightly. He looked so full... "Let's go back, Diviena. Even if you don't want the pteri I caught..."  
  
"Dad," she continued, less hesitantly this time after seeing his reaction and finding that even her mood lifted, as if vicariously. "Can you not call me that..."  
  
"Call you what?" He blinked.  
  
"Diviena," she forced herself to say; though it seemed to her to leave a bitter taste in her mouth.  
  
"Well, what else would I call you, darling?" He chortled. "It's your name." Ethea had to stifle a laugh at that. His expression was so simple, like it should be the most obvious thing in the world. Mad beyond a doubt...  
  
"I just... I like Ethea better. Can I be Ethea? Like a nickname..." She tried to sound reasonable and not give into the childish laughter that was picking at her. Debating for the right to use your own name...  
  
He shrugged, placing a wing over her back again, resting it gently atop her. "If you like, Div-Ethea. Viel doesn't call you that, does he?" He gave her a second glance, suddenly looking wary. "No," she said quickly. "I just thought of it now." Ethea smiled sweetly, which placated the elder of the two, who nodded and looked ahead again.  
  
They never did head back to whatever pteri he'd caught (or maybe just thought he'd caught), walking on. He picked up on talking to no one again, which was fine by her. She hadn't heard anyone speak in a long time before this...  
  
So it was settled then. She'd stay with him. At least for now. She couldn't leave the old wanker on his own, she told herself. Surely he couldn't manage too well out here with only half a mind. And if things got to complicated then she'd leave. Faster this time, or while he slept so he wouldn't catch up.  
  
But she'd stay...  
  
* * *  
  
In the months that followed, Ethea was able to begin making sense of what exactly had happened... Not in perfect clarity, but enough that she was able to play along with her grand parent (whose name turned out to be Ryke).  
  
Diviena and Viel had known each other since childhood. They'd often wander off together in adventure, only to have to be sought out by their parents on numerous occasions when they stayed out too long. Obviously Ryke did not approve of how close they became, and she could only assume that his resentment would be even worse if they decided to be mates. So, they'd eloped. The rest of that story she knew only too well...  
  
As for Ryke and his own mate Dilenne, they had their own troubles. Ryke was distraught by his only daughter's disappearance, especially because he knew that Viel had gone with her. He searched relentlessly for the two of them. Dilenne eventually came to terms with the fact that her daughter was gone, though that isn't to say that it didn't grieve her tremendously. But she got to the point where she felt she could move on with her life. Ryke never reached that stage. His searches increased in distance until he was barely ever back at the Clan.  
  
This plagued Dilenne to no end. Not only had she lost her daughter, but she was losing her mate as well. She told him so finally, demanding in her fit of grief that he choose between them. His love and his missing child. Ryke never answered, just turned on heel and pretended the conversation never happened. He stayed for a few days and then left again, oblivious all the while he was present to Dilenne's tears. But his mate had had enough... Whether she loved him or not, she couldn't take the hurt anymore. The Clan moved on, migrating further South and Dilenne went with them... Ryke was on his own.  
  
Whether he ever went back and discovered that his family and friends had abandoned them just as he'd abandoned them in pursuit of his child, Ethea never could find out. But at some point or another in his travels, he'd lost his mind. It seemed like he had told himself that Diviena and Viel were just wandering again, off on another adventure. He thought that Dilenne was back home, waiting for them to get back. As far as he let himself know, Diviena was still a cub, his cub. And unlike all the hallucinations that had started at one point, Ethea was real. And on some level she was familiar enough to make him believe that she was his child. His long-sought-after Diviena.  
  
This was enough for him, so this new life became enough for her. Not that she didn't want to leave sometimes. Even if she did grow fond of Ryke, the delusions did get tiring. And at times he'd insist she wasn't real again and that she was another hallucination that 'they' sent him. And other days he's shut up completely and refuse to talk, say that his heart had died with his daughter and not even look at her. Then the next morning, act like nothing had happened.  
  
But she stuck by him... He grew on you, and in a way he gave her something to call her own. If not family, then a responsibility. At times it felt more like he was the cub and she the adult. It gave her a reason... For what? She didn't know yet... She could only assume she'd figure it out somewhere down the line...  
  
* * *  
  
One of the upsides to Ryke was that he never wandered far from her, doting on her constantly, which she couldn't help but enjoy after so long on her own. A downside was that he had no sense of the need to be stealthy when food wasn't involved... As was the case in the next emergence of spring.  
  
She hadn't expected them all to just... materialize from the trees, like they'd been there all along. She hadn't expected Ryke to run up to one in particular and embrace her like she was his mate (which, on hindsight she knew was exactly what he'd thought). She hadn't expected this to be the daughter of the Alpha. And she surely hadn't expected to find herself struggling to hold Ryke back from the femme as the offended clan closed in...  
  
Life is full of surprises... She'd later find out so is death...  
  
* * *  
  
A/N: The summary above is brief, yes I know. But it will be elaborated on in the next chapter, which deals with Terru's first clan. It makes me happy and sad at the same time... So sue me, I love the little bitch that is my eyrie. She's like my baby ^^ My homicidal, maniacal little baby. Awwww... I would put in a '-hugs-' but I'd end up lacking an arm, so that doesn't make too much sense. Anywho, not my best work, I know... Sorry... I just wanted to get it written and out there. Maybe once I'm finished (if I ever finish, considering the RPs keep going x.X) I'll rewrite this chapter. So there it is! Comments? Oh come on, you know you want to. And I'm not just saying that to try and subliminally coax you into reviewing. Because you do want to review. Yeeeees, you definitely want to review. 


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